Oh Katheryn, I wonder if you will ever see this. If not, thats fine. Atleast I'm getting it off my chest. The past four months have been absolute hell for me. In late January, I finally admitted that I was being bullied and was contemplating suicide and had even almost attempted once. It had been six years of tormenting that no one had ever known about. They also didnt know that you were the one person who kept me on this earth and kept me going for as long as I had been. But little did I know, you would save me again. After revealing my suicidal thoughts and admitting I was a self harmer, I was admitted into a hospital. It was suppose to be a secret, but somehow everyone at my school found out. The bullies came back. Stronger, meaner. They made me hate school. I was so afraid of them. One day, they even placed a dare on who would push me down the stairs. And they did it. I didn't want to go back to the hospital, so I lied. I told everyone I was getting better. But a little less than a month after being released, my boyfriend of four years admitted he no longer loved me. He told me I was too much to handle and that he couldn't love someone who was so negative. I had loved him since the moment I met him when I was twelve years old, and still did. He was the love of my life. My source of happiness. My best friend. And its like the wind changed his mind. I lost it. My life was falling apart. If I had never admitted to being bullied I would have been okay. So, I decided to take my life. On February 21st, 2014, I attempted to jump out of a moving car on a busy street. My mother caught me, and I screamed to die. I was sent back to the hospital. I stared out the windows of my hospital room and watched his truck pass everyday, knowing I would never have him again. They released me again, but nothing had changed. I was still broken. The bullies were still there. My friends thought I was crazy and the love of my life no longer desired to even look at me. I started hearing voices and seeing things. I would throw myself into rage fits, shattering the car windshield once. I was going crazy, but I didn't know it was because I was allergic to a medication the hospital had put me on. But I didn't know it, so I kept it to myself, deciding to accept it. I went like this for two weeks. And thats when the person who I had loved more than anyone. The boy who was my entire life, called me trash and shoved me into a book shelf. I busted my cheek and was thrown into a rage. We both got into trouble and were sent to the office. He told them I tried to kill him and they believed him. My mom, who works at the school, pulled me from the office where I was having the biggest anxiety attack of my life. I passed out, and when I woke up I was in my moms room. I thought about everything. I knew it was never going to get better. And thats when I went for a pair of scissors and tried to kill myself once again. The nurse and my mother wrestled me to the ground, where I cried. I just cried. I was admitted into the hospital for a third time and finally told them everything. They knew I was in danger. They sent me to be homeschooled. Its gotten better. He still tells people I tried to kill him and spreads rumors, but they dont bother me anymore. I'm getting stronger. Im a fighter. And even though sometimes its hard to see the bright side, I listen to Prism and know you went through the same thing. And you came out stronger. I look up to you, just like before. But even more now. If it wasn't for your loving personality and inspiring music, I'd be six feet under. Every time I feel attempted, I sit and meditate to Prism. Anytime I feel worthless because of bullies, I listen to Firework and Pearl. You saved my life Katy. You were here for me when no one else was, and still is. So when I say I love you, I mean it. I could never repay you for what you did for me.